Understanding Gratitude
Simply defined gratitude is a state of being thankful for, or appreciative of, what is valuable and meaningful to us.
“We should certainly count our blessings, but we should also make our blessings count“ Neil A. Maxwell.
Gratitude and mindfulness are symbiotic. They work interdependently to each other. When we are been mindful we appreciate, and, are grateful for things in the present. When eating mindfully we are grateful for the flavours in the food - we take a time to appreciate them. By mindfully focusing on present and clearing our minds of all the negativity we, by default, are appreciative for the good, the beauty around us - warm sun on our face, the fresh air we breathe.
There are a number of ways we can cultivate an attitude of gratitude that’s completely change our lives.
One example is simply “saying thank you”. Being grateful for everything you have in life, whether thanks be to a God, the universe or ourselves. I am grateful that, after having fertility treatment, we are blessed with three healthy children. I take the time to thank each and every person at work who contact me via an unsolicited email or LinkedIn message. I take the time to thank them for making contact, and if the opportunity is not of interest, I notify them in a polite and respectful manner.
Another way is “being satisfied”. Being happy with what you have, rather than wanting more. For me, I am happy that I have my health, whilst I may not be an ideal weight accept this and I’m satisfied I am healthy and can still do everything I want. I am a runner, and over time, naturally have slowed down my average pace. I am not fixated on where I used to be, but pleased that I can run, and have made amazing friends along the way, and completed 2 50KM ultramarathons.
By writing down things you are truly grateful for in a gratitude log you will get into the habit of recognising the good things in your life. You will find gratitude becomes a habit and when it is a habit, happiness will soon follow.
It may sound simple to say that gratitude can make such a big difference to your state of mind and mental health, but this idea goes hand-in-hand with the knowledge that lifestyle and thought patterns contribute far more with mental health problems we originally thought.
Along with the act of meditation and mindfulness it’s important to learn to observe our thoughts. This is because many of us have lived with mindless chatter going on in our lives for so long it has begin to define us. These negative thoughts come through a pessimistic and unrealistic such as ‘I am stupid’, ‘I am fat’, ‘I am worthless’. They become ingrained in our mind and influence all our thoughts and decisions. They will affect every aspect of our life and the root of these need to be found to address this damage.
When we struggle with our mental health be that through stress, depression or anxiety, intrusive thoughts and damaging beliefs tend to claim our headspace far more than when we are feeling good. When they claim that space, if these damaging thoughts and beliefs are left unchecked, they become deep-set beliefs, which can literally wreck our lives.
We naturally try to push these negative belief patterns and intrusive thoughts away without observing them from a neutral standpoint. Pushing thoughts away like this without examination actually makes them stronger, and we end up fighting them whilst also believe in them.
A balanced response is the challenge made to negative thoughts by introducing positive thoughts and providing evidence based contradictions to those negative thoughts.
By practising gratitude we learn to address these negative thought and counterbalance them with positive grateful thoughts.